Pure Malarkey- Baby steps to the Beach!

Pure Malarkey is a 3-bedroom lake-view cottage on warm-water Lake Osoyoos, just steps from direct beach access—perfect for floating the day away. Unwind on the veranda at sunset or cool off with A/C and a lush resort pool. Explore a mile-long beach, playgrounds, pickleball courts, walking trails, marina, lakeside diner, on-site gym, and EV charging. Your relaxing lakeside escape awaits.

Highlights & Amenities:

🏞️ Prime Lake & Beach Access – Steps from the sandy shoreline and perfect for swimming, floating, beach games, and sunset views.
🛏️ Comfy Sleeping Options –
• Master suite with king bed and ensuite
• Queen bedroom
• Loft with two doubles & two twins — perfect for kids or friends.
🍳 Fully Equipped Kitchen – Plenty of space for cooking meals and family breakfasts with coffee makers (drip & Nespresso) and essentials included.
🔥 Outdoor Patio & Verandas – Relax with lake views, dine al fresco, and enjoy yard games while the kids play.
🛋️ Open Living Space – Spacious great room with comfy seating, fireplace, and large flat-screen TV — perfect for evening downtime.
🏊 Resort-Style Community Perks – Access to pool, hot tub, playgrounds, pickleball and basketball courts, walking trails, marina, diner, store, fitness center and more.
📶 Wi-Fi & Comfort – Fast internet and air conditioning keep everyone happy whether you’re streaming or chilling indoors.
📍 Unbeatable Location – Located in the heart of Veranda Beach Resort on Lake Osoyoos — warm waters, sandy beaches, and endless fun are right outside your door.

Important notes:
🐾 PETS
We love furry friends and welcome up to two dogs with a $100 pet fee.
• More than two dogs? Please message us to arrange additional payment ($50 per extra dog).
• Pet fees must be paid in full at least 24 hours prior to check-in or we reserve the right to cancel the stay without refund.
• Dogs must be leashed in all community common areas.
• Enjoy the fenced yard with lush grass, and please pick up after your pets before departure.
⏰ EARLY CHECK-IN / LATE CHECK-OUT
Early check-in or late check-out may be approved case by case and is often accommodated when possible.
• Written approval is required prior to arrival.
🤫 QUIET HOURS
Quiet hours are 10:00 PM – 8:00 AM.
• Excessive noise or disturbances during this time may result in immediate termination of your stay without refund.
🎣 FISH & GAME
We respect hunters and anglers; however:
• No fish or game cleaning inside the cabin.
• An outdoor spigot is available for these activities.
🏊 SHARED SPACES & ACCESS KEYS
Enjoy community amenities including:
• Pool & hot tub
• Game room
• Fitness room (no street shoes)
• Diner, store & marina
🚗 PARKING
• Parking is located across the street or at the rear of the community.
• To keep streets safe and kid-friendly, parking at cottages is load & unload only.
• A parking pass will be provided and must be displayed on your dashboard.
🗑️ TRASH
• Nightly trash pickup occurs at 8:00 PM from the street.
🚭 SMOKING
• No smoking is permitted inside the cabin at any time.
⚠️ LIABILITY
This property is privately owned. Owners are not responsible for accidents, injuries, or illness that may occur during your stay.
By booking, guests agree to assume all risks associated with use of the property and its amenities.
🏡 House Rules

🌅 Check-in & Check-out
Check-in: 4:00 PM or later
Check-out: 10:00 AM
Parking @ the cottage for load & unload only.
Early check-in/late check-out may be available upon request.

👥 Guest Policies

Maximum occupancy: [9 guests]
Only registered guests allowed on the property.
No parties, events, or large gatherings without prior approval.
Minimum age to book: 25 years old

🚭 Smoking, Pets & Noise

No smoking or vaping inside the home.
Pets: [Allowed] — if allowed, please clean up after them and keep off furniture (includes veranda). Wet animals need to dry on the Veranda.
Quiet hours: 10:00 PM – 8:00 AM (be mindful of neighbors and the lakefront setting).

🔥 Safety & Property Care

Please no fires outside of designated fire pits or BBQ areas.
Always supervise children near the waterfront and dock.
Turn off lights, AC/heat, and appliances when leaving.
No shoes or flops inside — help keep the home clean.
Report any damages or issues immediately so we can address them quickly.

🛶 Lake & Outdoor Use

Use life jackets and follow local water safety rules.
No glass containers near the dock or shoreline.
Return kayaks, paddles, and outdoor gear to their storage spots after use.

🧹 Before You Go

Wash dishes or start the dishwasher.
Place used towels in the bathroom or laundry area.
Take out trash and recycling to the designated bins.
Leave the home tidy and as you found it — thank you!

💬 Other Notes

We want you to relax and enjoy your time at the lake! Please treat the property and neighbors with the same care you would your own home.