If you've ever wondered what it would be like to star in your own low-budget horror/comedy, this is the place for you.The adventure begins before you even get in. The elevator is broken, so you'll get your cardio climbing five flights of stairs with all of your luggage and food items. Who needs a gym membership? The carpet is... memorable. Let's just say we kept our shoes on the entire stay. Fingerprints are proudly displayed on the glass patio door from previous guests, and the dishes and sticky door handles will make you wonder what the "cleaning fee" actually paid for. As for amenities? Toilet paper was apparently a limited-edition item. No hand soap, no shampoo, no body soap. Hope you packed like you were going camping. WIFI? The TV continually would show "loading".Complementary wildlife included a couple of cockroaches. it's always nice to know your not vacationing alone.The neighborhood added to the experience, with the same group of homeless individuals outside every time we walked to and from the building. While everyone we encountered was non-confrontational, it wasn't exactly the relaxing vacation we were expecting.And just when you think you've experienced it all, you're charged 50 a night to park at a nearby lot. Nothing says "thank you for staying with us" like paying luxury parking prices to hike up five flights of stairs to a dirty apartment.Overall, if you're looking for a clean, comfortable vacation rental, I'd keep scrolling.