‘I’m not sure that you should dig there John’ said Fred, nervously looking on as his colleague thrust his spade into the hole that he’d just started to dig. ‘It’ll be alright' said John, 'I mean what could possibly go wrong?’
‘Can you smell gas?’ asked Fred. ‘Ah, replied John, now looking rather red-faced, ‘that’s what that big pipe was. Let’s get out of here’
And so it started, the Great Woolacombe Gas Shortage*, in which thousands of jubilee week holiday makers were thrown into total chaos as they were unable to have a hot shower before they went out, and when they did go out, there was a good chance that the restaurant they were going to wasn’t even open. This was a disaster on such a grand scale that not even Lord Parkin of Parkin Estates could get it sorted for 3 days
But it would take a bit more than slightly greasy hair to put a dampener on our annual pilgrimage to Woolacombe and our latest stay at No 5 Narracott Apartments.
As ever, the apartment was impeccably clean when we arrived, adorned by a wonderfully sumptuous new sofa in the mezzanine lounge area, resulting in extra seating downstairs, both of which meant that I could comfortably wait for the local weather forecast on TV whilst my wife and daughters could sit upstairs and argue about which judge on Britains Got Talent really does have the biggest ego
I didn’t need to worry about the weather of course, due, as usual to Maddy at Holiday Home Hunters actually arranging for a full week of uninterrupted sun - these guys literally sort out everything for you!
My one regret of the otherwise perfect week was the moment when sitting in Bar Electric with a pint and staring wistfully over the Bristol Channel, I got chatting to a couple who asked me about where I was staying. I told them all about No 5 and suddenly, in the middle of waxing lyrical about how perfect it was for us, both the apartment itself and the brilliantly convenient location, I panicked that they were genuinely interested in renting it themselves. They’d already told me that they came the same week every year which meant they potentially could gazump me next year. I had no choice but to backtrack and so I told them that they didn’t allow dogs (which of course they do), that the beds were actually a little bit uncomfortable (which of course they’re not) and that the view from the balcony isn’t great (which of course is nonsense, it’s spectacular). I don’t know whether they saw through my strategy or not, but I do hope so. Especially as the wife said that I look like captain Birdseye. Cheek of it.
*as ever with Holiday Home Hunters, the communication (throughout the gas problem) was timely, informative and helpful. In addition, Maddy personally took the time out to ensure that we had been re-connected despite it being the Bank Holiday weekend.