Short walks to Beach & Town. Large deck with BBQ. Super Fast Internet, 85" Tele

🚗 Parking
Maximum of 4 cars on the property. Driveway must be kept free at all times — this isn’t the Whangamatā V8 Supercars.

🌐 Internet Speeds
The internet’s so good you could stream the All Blacks highlights while uploading TikToks of your BBQ and still have enough bandwidth left to Zoom your boss and pretend you’re “working remotely.” Worst Wi‑Fi is in the bunk room (2.4 GHz → 20 Mbps, 5 GHz → 40 Mbps). Everywhere else you’ll be cruising at 40–100 Mbps — faster than a tradie spotting a pie warmer.

🍖 Deck Life
The deck’s so big you could host a family reunion, a wedding, and a backyard cricket match all at once. There’s a big rectangular table for serious feasts, a round table for people who like to argue about politics, and permanent seating along the side for those who just want to spectate with a beer in hand.

🔥 The Weber’s got a thermostat, which means you can roast a leg of lamb from the butcher without having to guess if it’s “done” or “still baa‑ing.” Basically, it’s the Whangamatā version of Eden Park — but with better catering.

📺 Lounge Setup
The lounge has a “little” 85" TV on the wall — so big you’ll feel like Damien McKenzie’s sidestep is happening in your living room. Plug in your Firestick without touching the TV thanks to the HDMI port on a long lead (because no one wants fingerprints on an 85‑inch monster).

🛋️ There’s not just one couch — there’s another one too, because apparently one couch wasn’t enough. The main couch folds out into a king‑size bed, so if you fall asleep mid‑Netflix binge, you’ll wake up feeling like royalty. The other couch? Perfect for mates who insist on commentating the rugby like they’re on Sky Sport.

🍳 Kitchen & Laundry
🦾 The kitchen’s “basic,” but the dishwasher is an absolute beast — it’ll smash through dishes faster than a hungover flatmate demolishing a family pack of nuggets.

🔥 Brand new oven with one of those fancy stovetops that boils eggs like it’s auditioning for MasterChef. You’ll feel like Gordon Ramsay, minus the swearing (unless you burn the toast).

🗄️ Pantry’s got the essentials — so you won’t be stuck trying to MacGyver dinner out of tomato sauce, Weet‑Bix, and a packet of mints.

🍷 Glassware situation is out of control: wine glasses for the classy nights, beer handles for the rugby nights, coffee cups for the mornings after, plus cutlery, plates, pots, pans, and a toaster (because nothing says “holiday” like burning your first slice).

🥤 Oh, and there’s one of those fancy mixer things for smoothies. Perfect for whipping up a “liver‑healing” green sludge after a big night at the pub. Warning: it won’t actually heal your liver, but it might convince you you’re making good life choices while you’re still holding a pie.

👕 Laundry’s rocking a 9kg washing machine, a dryer, and a clothesline out the back — perfect for drying towels, togs, or that one shirt you swore you wouldn’t spill beer on (but did anyway).

🥶 Two fridges inside — one for food, one strictly for cold drinks. Priorities, mate. If you put broccoli in the drinks fridge, you’ll be politely asked to leave Whangamatā.

🏖️ Location Perks
Less than 5 minutes to Exit 4 and you’re in the sea 🏊.

1 minute walk to the main street 🛍️.

Dangerously close to the liquor store 🍷, the police station 🚓, and a Westpac ATM 💰 — so you can withdraw cash, buy your box of beers, and get arrested all in one efficient trip.

🛏️ Bedrooms
👑 King Room The king‑size bedroom comes with its own ensuite and a door straight onto the deck — perfect for sneaking out to the BBQ before anyone else wakes up. It’s got a TV with an HDMI port, so you can binge Netflix in bed and pretend you’re “resting up” for tomorrow’s surf.

👸 Queen Room The queen bedroom also opens onto the deck, which means you can roll straight out of bed and into a beanbag with a coffee. TV with HDMI port included — because sometimes you need to watch Shortland Street in peace.

🛌 Bunk Room Two double bunks that have survived four big blokes (100kg+ each) on golf trips — proof they’re sturdier than half the bridges in Auckland. There’s a little TV for the kids on rainy days, or for adults who want to hide from the chaos and watch cartoons.

💪 Gym Facilities
Gym = lawnmower. Help yourself. 🏋️‍♂️🌱 Best workout is pushing it uphill after a few beers — guaranteed to burn calories and dignity.

☀️ Solar Power Shenanigans
This place runs on solar panels with a battery that’s smarter than half the blokes at the pub. It even gives power back to the grid — so technically you’re saving the planet while you’re smashing a box of beers.

📱 Tech Toy for the Kids
You can monitor it all on your phone or computer. Great for teaching the kids a life lesson: when they see how much gas the dryer chews through, they’ll suddenly discover the ancient art of hanging clothes on the line or the clothes horse. Nothing like renewable energy guilt to turn them into eco‑warriors.

🏏 Cricket Proof Power
And don’t panic if the power cuts out with one over to go — the battery kicks in faster than a Black Caps slip fielder diving for a catch. You’ll be back online before the bowler’s finished polishing the ball.

🌥️ Cloudy Day Backup
Not sunny? No worries. The system still pulls power from the grid, so you won’t be left sitting in the dark like a batsman waiting for the umpire to check the light.

🚿 Bathroom(S)
The bathroom’s got everything you need — shower, toilet, basin — the holy trinity of holiday hygiene. No spa jets or gold taps, but it’ll get you clean enough to walk down the main street without locals mistaking you for a shipwreck survivor.

🧻 Toilet Truths
The loos flush like a champ. None of that weak “trickle and pray” business — this thing could probably take out a meat pie in one go (not recommended, but you get the idea).

🪞 Mirror Moments
Big mirror for checking yourself before heading out. Warning: it’s brutally honest. If you’ve had a few too many the night before, it’ll remind you. Think of it as Whangamatā’s version of a life coach.

🧴 Essentials
There’s space for all your shampoos, conditioners, and those mysterious “body wash” bottles people bring on holiday but never use. Towels dry fast on the clothesline out back — unless you forget them and the neighbour’s dog decides they’re chew toys.